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November 14, 2012

This is a quick update as it’s another full on day and I need to get some rest as well.

Last night I ended up in A&E. I’m sure it was the stress of the day. It’s funny how being wired up to a heart monitor clears the brain. And a very odd thing happened. One of the nurses was asking me what had happened and it turned out she’d read my book. She made a very good observation: “Funny how on both times you’ve asked for help from Hillingdon, it’s turned into a nightmare”.

She was right. But it’s helped me decide on the approach today when I meet the housing officer to discuss the step by step process of the eviction and rehousing.

Hillingdon have never understood families and the importance of family life (if anything they are quite hostile towards it), so why bother trying to discuss on those terms. There is no point in getting into a moral, humanitarian, ethical discussion about the situation either – they don’t work on that level. The only way this will work is to work on the lowest common denominator – their duty of care towards Steven.

So, take me out of the picture; I am just a live in  carer – I am as relevant as one of the support workers. The focus has to be on Steven’s place of residence.

That leaves a simple choice. Stay here in our flat or move to social housing. As Steven will be expected to pay the full rent as they will exclude him from HB because of his damages, what will work best for Steven. So, it boils down to what will preserve his compensation the longer, and that will be social housing.

I want to thank all the people who have messaged me on this blog, Twitter and facebook since yesterday with advice and suggestions on people who can intervene. I really do appreciate it. I’m too tired and unwell at the moment to act on those suggestions but I will get on to it as soon as I feel better.



From → Social Care

  1. Suzanne Hayes permalink

    I am so sorry for you and Steven you are right the council do not work with families on any thing they would rather pay £3.000 per week to put someone into a care home or institution when it the families who are best placed to help. You take care of yourself with out you steven is lost just the same as we are with John I am going to try Citizens Advice as you have been told to do never thought of them

    Take care hope it goes your way

  2. David permalink

    This is appalling. If there is anything I can do to help please let me know – I have e mailed.

  3. Please don’t do anything hasty Mark these are not your only two options… If you allow the council to find you social housing you just know that they will find you the most shittiest shithole they can… just because they can.

    I would really think about exploring the shared ownership route. Steven could use his damages as a deposit to pay for a part share in his own home (one that you have chosen together), this would bring your rent down to a more affordable level and Steven would also then qualify for help with this. A much better use of his money than to have it frittered away on the rent for whatever shithole the council come up with IMO xxx

  4. Yasmin permalink

    Dear Mark,

    You are a very courageous man you must stay well and strong the pressure put upon us is immense.

    Despite the difficulties you have an amazing sense of humor and you write so eloquently.

    In times like this the system can grind you down and make anyone ill.

    The fact that we care for our loved ones can be hard especially when an injustice has been done. and that feeling of being alone is awful.

    This can be a very lonely journey going thru this bureaucratic labyrinth.

    Finally my local paper once again is supporting my sons plight. Its only a fraction of what is happening yet this gives me also the strength to keep going……

    Best Wishes.

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